There is a special day in France, called the Monuments Day, or something like that, and we took the opportunity of visiting this impressive tower on that day...

Grand, isn't it ?

Well, this town, Crest, is not very far from here, about 3O kilometres away. So, our faithful Toyota was eager once again to get us there.

Here's a second distance shot of the Tower :

On that special day, we also went to another very nice place, but it will be the topic of another post. I expected to see many people coming to visit the tower like us, and I was not disappointed. The French love having a look inside all their public monuments because they are justly proud of their elders' sense of grandeur. And they mainly do it because on that day, visits are free of charge.

If you live in Paris, which is not our case, you can visit all the ministries and even have a look at the President's digs, at the Palais de l'Elysée, because he is conveniently out somewhere with his jet-set pals to spend the week-end, so that his people can see the office they will not ever work in. Even the toilets have got solid gold washbasins and taps, I have been told. But I may be wrong, so don't quote me on that.

But let's get back to our little provincial town and its bigger-that-life tower. We had to wait for about one hour and twelve long minutes of despair at the gates of this huge fortress. While people waited, they were conveniently entertained by a group of actors clad in medieval costumes. It could have been boring, or just ordinary. But, boy, oh boy, it was FUN !

There was a larger-than-life executioner, complete with fake axe, black bushy beard, raucous voice, hairy chest and leather pants. He even wore the mask that these charming people had to wear, perhaps for fear of a victim's relative to take revenge upon them. But this one was rather a comic book executioner than a really frightening one. And children gathered around his benevolent giant figure to make fun of him because he always got ass-kicked by a maiden whom he thought he could persuade to do his ironing and cooking. But apparently, she was a feminist avantgardist and told him each time to get lost.

Anyway, it was a bit long but we finally entered and I had my hand severed right away and put on a frame on the wall for the visitors' edification. Just look at that :

Then we had to climb lots of stairs, because there was no elevator inside, and the corridors and some passages were extremely narrow.

Let me tell you the story of this tower : it was first built by the Bishop of another nearby town, no bigger than this one, but probably wealthier, so that it could entertain a big fat bishopry within its walls. So our buddy bishop, around the 12th century, decided he will built himself a nicey tower, so that he could just teach some pagan folk who God really was and how great he was, by putting them into prison, and a very tall prison. This way, they would be able to hear Him better, at the top of the tower. And throw themselves down when they could not stand His Voice any longer.

It was like that. And it worked so very well, that this tower always remained a prison, at least up to the times of the third Reich, sorry, Republic, during which Napoleon the Third, nicknamed Napoleon the Little, did what the Bishop of Die originally did : put those who did not believe in him into the Tower.

What can you see inside a prison ? Graffitis from the inmates, of course. Have you ever seen graffitis from 12th century inmates ? There are a lot in Crest Tower. They are even preserved. Some cells have been transformed into museum rooms and the best examples are displayed in the form of widely blown up photos.

Now let's see what there is just before you reach the top :

This staircase gives you a clue on how narrow the passages are in this tower. Then, there was avery dark space just under the roof :

Thrilling, isn't it ? Just like in some fantasy/sorcery novel in which you are the hero, ready to get sliced up into innumerable slices. And then, boiled. To make sure you won't be bothering the Dark Sorcerer any longer.

But unfortunately for your family, you end up safe.

Now look at that : eerie and frightening, isn't it ? Well, maybe not :

In fact, these two guys were charming bastards, like you might know a lot, a bit on the baldy and fatty side for the one on the left. Definitely on the baldy side for the hat-bearing one. No trolls or fashionable hat-loving goblins, which would have been rather nice. For the atmosphere, I mean.

Now, let's look at the view, pilgrims :

The little Arizona-like mountain you see is the place I was referring to before, where we went just before visiting the Crest Tower. You might remember its name : Saou. Another nice shot :

This view being mightily improved because of Atsuko's presence on it, of course. You might also put on your glasses back and notice the small dwarf rainbow just behind her, thank you very much for not paying attention. I was sure you had not seen it.

Well, of course, there was not much to do at the top pf the Tower except looking at how fat people were going to get down, provided you went first, of course and watch them from under. Yes, that was how narrow the staircase was : some people could not even reach the top. By helicopter would have been the only solution.. Now look from the BOWELS of the tower to see how the houses looked small from so high up :

Atsuko once more got fed up with my unceasing chattering and stupid joking habit. She located a proper cell for me and got me locked up for a couple of hours in it. I promised to shut up for at least twenty minutes everyday until the end of that week. Look at my poor plight :

We finally got back to our faithful Toyota, happy to have spent a nice afternoon in the oldest jail of the region.

Free of charge.

Now the whole lot of photos taken this day :